


Loyalty

by Celebrimbor_Of_Eregion



Series: Angsty Silvergifting (and Other Angsty Celebrimbor Things) [6]
Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: M/M, Mental Ilness, Self-Harm, Silverfisting, embrace the angst, references to past torture, silvergifting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-06 19:24:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16838875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Celebrimbor_Of_Eregion/pseuds/Celebrimbor_Of_Eregion
Summary: AU where Celebrimbor joins Sauron's side, but it does not go the way Sauron planned.





	Loyalty

Mairon smiled, awaiting his Lieutenant. The war was still in its height, and there was a lot to do, but tonight, he will not be thinking about this all.

Ever since Tyelpë had healed enough to take the position, he’d been rigid and unresponsive. In Eregion, they would kiss sweetly, taking short breaks from work; almost every night, Tyelpë would be his. He had been dreaming about the moment when Tyelpë would join his cause. Then, the happiness of their love would be completed by the satisfaction brought by useful work, and they would be true to each other. But when he tried to kiss Tyelpë, the Elf’s lips weren’t as pliant as they used to be. And when he suggested that they spend the night together, Tyelpë replied, “If that’s what my Lord desires.” There wasn’t much enthusiasm in his voice. Perhaps Mairon put too many duties on him; perhaps, Tyelpë was still upset at his Lord for all the pain he had endured.

Tonight, he would correct it. Tyelpë had always been fond of romantic things; Mairon, not so much, but this night was for Tyelpë. Silently, Mairon looked around the room and checked every element. Dinner, yes; candles, yes; roses, yes - who cares if he grew them with magic? Even the curtains were blue since Tyelpë loved the color. Would it work?..

A knock on the door interrupted his reflections. “Come in, Tyelpë darling!” Mairon called.

Tyelpë came in, plainly dressed, his hair in a simple braid. He has had this style for as long as he served Mairon (which is, two months), and the Dark Lord was a little upset at that. Tyelpë used to be deeply invested into his appearance. But maybe it’s the result of all the suffering he had endured at Mairon’s hands? Maybe he only needed love and care to return to his previous wonderful self. Mairon would give him that.

“Come here, Tyelpë, why are you standing in the doorway?” Mairon smiled and beckoned for him to approach.

Tyelpë stepped closer, looking around, surprise in his gaze but no delight. Mairon felt uneasy.

“I thought my Lord would give me orders and send me away,” Tyelpë explained. “It looks like my Lord is expecting someone important. Should I send for them?”

Mairon blinked. Did Tyelpë’s self-esteem drop so badly he didn’t even dare think it was for him?

“No need, that person is already here,” Mairon reassured him, smiling, and pointed at the other chair. “Please, Tyelpë, have a seat.”

“Oh.”

That was the most emotional sentence Mairon has heard from him in two months.

Obediently, Tyelpë sat next to his Lord, his gaze respectfully lowered.

“Tyelpë, love,” Mairon purred, rubbing the Elf’s shoulder gently, “no need to be so servile all the time. I do not require this, my good boy. It is acceptable for diplomatic events or in front of our inferiors, but when we’re alone, you can be yourself.”

Tyelpë looked curiously at the hand caressing his shoulder. “Myself is nothing but the desire to serve my Lord,” he explained, still not looking up.

“You’re serving me very well, darling,” Mairon assured. “I am proud of you.”

Tyelpë bowed his head, smiling happily. This comment definitely brought him more joy than the dinner Mairon organized for him. That felt… odd.

“You’re doing your work well, Tyelpë, but you should rest too, and be happy, and enjoy my love. You know I love you, right?”

Tyelpë’s face looked puzzled. Mairon was growing more and more disturbed by his reactions. What on Arda was wrong with this Elf?!

“That is delightful to hear, my Lord,” Tyelpë finally replied. “I, on my part, do respond with love and loyalty for my Master.”

Mairon took a deep breath. Once, when Melkor upset him, he took on this role of a Lieutenant for a day, pretending they were nothing more than a master and a servant. Melkor was frustrated and had to apologize. But Tyelpë’s behavior looked genuine, there was no pretense or playfulness in his demeanor.

Maybe the best way was to be honest. “Tyelpë, I am sorry. I know I inflicted a lot of pain upon you. I deeply regret it, and I love you. I would like things between us to be as they were in Eregion.”

“In Eregion, my Lord?” Tyelpë blinked in confusion. “I do not think I ever visited that land.”

For the first time in years, Mairon felt cold shivers run down his back. “Tyelpë,” he asked carefully, “where do you think you’re from?”

“Mordor, my Lord,” Tyelpë replied without pause.

Mairon took a deep breath. “Tyelpë, no. You lived in Eregion. You lived there with me. Don’t you remember, my love?”

“I do not, my Lord,” the Elf answered. “I apologize. Would my Lord like to punish me for my neglect?”

It was impossible; Tyelpë did not remember anything! Oh, what had he done. What had he done.

“No, no, Tyelpë darling, there’s no need to punish you,” Mairon reassured, stroking his back lightly. Oh, no. Poor Tyelpë.

“That is right,” the Elf nodded. “My Lord should not have to bother punishing me. I am perfectly capable of doing it myself.”

Mairon felt a new wave of shivers descend down his back. “Tyelpë? What do you mean?”

The Elf undid a little button on his wrist to pull his left sleeve up. On his forearm, there was a trace of a large burn. It still looked a bit raw. “This I did when I misunderstood my Lord’s order,” Tyelpë explained calmly.

Mairon sighed in frustration. What was he to ask of Tyelpë? Around that injury, there were others, scars from whipping, cutting, traces of the torments he had inflicted on the poor creature. Apparently, Tyelpë’s mind was now also scarred.

“Please, don’t punish yourself ever again, Tyelpë,” Mairon asked softly, stroking the Elf’s dark hair.

“I hear and obey,” Tyelpë nodded.

“Go to bed, darling boy,” Mairon sighed. “You must be tired.”

“Thank you, my Lord, I will,” Tyelpë nodded, ignoring the “tired” part. Immediately, he rose and walked to the door, where he bowed respectfully before leaving the room.

Mairon waited till the noise of his steps vanished and moved his plate away to put his arms on the table and press his forehead against them. For the first time in centuries, he cried.


End file.
